...changing...

yupyup, i am forever changing my template. i just love changing them. a sense of satisfaction after loading the template to my blog though i did not design them. the templates make me love my blog more. =D i think i mentioned it before that i love white backgrounds templates. it just brightens up my day to see refreshing colours, like white. it will be better if it's made up of happy colours too!

as i was watching desperate housewives on 5 last night, the lee hwa jewellery commerical kept showing either at the start or the end of the almost 10 minutes commerical break. it just brought me back to when i first switched on the TV after my YEP trip. i roughly remembered the time was around 1230am. i just took a shower and could not resist the temptation to press the buttons on the remote control after being cut off from the technology world for almost 2 weeks. =) the first image on the screen was... YES! lee hwa jewellery commerical. it was exactly the same one which i saw last monday. haha... i sound like a complete idiot.

"leave them outside"

...holidays...

today is the start of the holidays and i have to start it all with a bad note. i am sick. down with sorethroat and flu. might be due to the chocolates i ate for the past few days. or maybe it is because of the durians i ate a few days back. or maybe the MAC i had for dinner last night made me sick.

i cannot find a template that i like. ii took a looooong time and found this one. =)

"take good care of my health and not make them worry"

...star wars...

well, i am not a star wars freak but i still went to watch the movie yesterday. heard from eileen and jess that it is a depressing movie and it will make one sad. hmmm...

my favourite character is the grand master yoda. i know he is short, green, ugly, old,... but he is soooo agile when he fought with the lord sith. he jumped from one corner to another effortlessly. yeah!!! he rocks.

"need to learn how to let things go or else you will submit yourself to the dark side"

how true is it? we all have burdens. we all want our loved ones to be healthy. the closer we are, the more we do not want to lose it. i cannot explain that. it is just in us. some people show that character very strongly in front of the people to the extent that it may cause power struggle. argH!! i hate internal conflicts. how terrifying it is to know that we have to backstab one another to get what we aim for. i totally look down on these people because they are self-centred. can they spare a thought for those around them? i feel that it is exactly the situation that anakin was in. all he wanted was to protect his beloved princess from death that caused him to submit to the dark forces. however, he did not weigh the consequences of his actions when he knelt, bowed and greeted the lord sith, " my master". rmb he was the chosen one? the hope of the millions of people in the galaxy on him to bring balance to the galaxy was destroyed. he had broken the hearts of his princess and his master. arghhh... i just feel like giving him 2 tight slaps to wake him up when he did not kill the lord sith.

the movie was dragging at some parts. =(but if you are interested, go watch it.

i woke up late again.thursday is a bad day because i have waken up late for 2 consecutive weeks already. i took a cab to sch today and when i entered the cab and told the driver where i was going, his immediate reaction was " ohh... the one at coporation road?" i was like " huh?" NO! the one at bukit timah. he had mistaken my sch uniform for another secondary sch uniform. irritating.

a short day became a long day today.i was supposed to be dismissed from sch at 120pm but thanks to the phys and math makeup and prinicpal dialogue session, i could only leave the school around 430pm. on my way home, my head felt heavy. something seemed to be pressing against my brain. unbearable. luckily, the bus came shortly and i slept the whole journey and thankfully, i did not miss my bus stop. phew!

going to catch AMIresults show later. i know who won the title. YEAH!!! but i still want to watch it. haha... i have chem tutorial to do. argh!!! how depressing. june hols are coming. yeah! i am supposed to cheer right? but, it is the mugging period for me. how sad. work hard everyone. push on ya?

"late but it's better than never"

...a test...

i took a personality test again.

Your Birthdate: January 31

Your birthday suggests that you are a good organizer and manager, an energetic and dependable worker; attributes often showing success in the business world. Serious and sincere, you have the patience and determination necessary to accomplish a great deal. Your approach can be original, but often rigid and stubborn. Sensitivity may be present, but feeling are likely to be repressed. You are good with detail and insist on accuracy, but at times scatter energies. You're a practical thinker, but not without imagination. You love travel and don't like to live alone. You should probably marry early, for responsibility is necessary for your stability.

...celebration...

had a talk with them today. hope that things will finally work out. we will not be there for them everytime. we cannot teach and direct them always. it's time for them to grow up, experience it and lead well. =D

went to meet kns at 6pm to celebrate pee's and eve's belated 18th birthday. haha... nv ever meet at dohby ghaut mrt control station cos it is extremely confusing. it took me great effort to find the stupid mrt control station at the north east line part. i had to walk up and down, turn left and right. argH! irritating. and bobo was late!!!! hahaha...

we went to eat. dear all, in order not to spoil your happy mood, do not and i mean dont even attempt to dine in at that outlet. i should not mention where it is and what it is. the service SUCKS. when we went in, the table was totally uncleared. we could see bits and pieces of the food left behind by the previous customers. the seats were oily or wet. they only started to wiped the table clean after we approached them. they only served us our iced water after we requested for them. they did not set the table for us. when we requested for the utensils, they did not give us sufficient and they just placed the stack of plates, forks, knives at one corner of the table. they still DID not set the table for us. that was just plainly providing us with the utensils only. well, thanks for the effort. we could have gone into the kitchen and gotten the utensils by ourselves if that was the service we wanted. it totally destroyed our mood though some of us were starving. pissed off. we had the intention to leave the restaurant immediately but we did not. we gave our feedback to the manager and guess what, we did not pay for the service charge. well, that was reasonable. in fact, we were serving ourselves.

we started taking pictures of one another with our camera phones. and we took neoprints. haha... so pretty. =D after which, pui, eve and pee went home. left me, ally, fang, woon and bobo. we walked from PS to heeren. we finally settled down at the NYDC outside heeren. the service there was soooo much better than the previous one. =D and the waiter who served us was quite handsome looking. haha... we continued to take stupid pictures with our phones again. how wonderful the bluetooth technology is. we started sending pictures through bluetooth here and there and searched for names whom we did not know of, like "sadspider", "daniel". our dearest woon had to read out the names that we did not know very loudly. omg...

we have made an agreement. the kns will meet our every month. we are planning to meet during the 2nd week of june. so people, pls study hard and leave a day off from your mugging and meet out okay? yeah!! we rock!

"best to have friends around"

...long weekend...

yeah! it's the long weekend again! =D but the tutors are not going to give us an easy time. haizz... how depressing. tutors are pulling each other's hair to fight for the few more seconds with the class in order to finish the syllabus. i do not have much complain cos i am used to the bullet train speed since RV. =) the mid year holidays are coming. it is the mugging period cos my mid-year is in july. more depressing. it's OKAY. i am going to have fun tmr. going to celebrate eve's and pee's bday tmr at the fish and co glasshouse. woah... i love fish and co. hahaz...

maybe i am too picky. maybe i love to compare them with the others. i hate to be on the losing side. i hate people who criticize them. it pains my heart when i see no improvement is done since the last time i went back. it saddens me to see it deteriorates. i feel helpless. there is limited things that i can do to help them. it discourages me to put in more effort when they themselves are not motivated to improve. the situation worsens when we cannot see eye to eye. it's not a one man show. it requires team effort. tomorrow will be the day to thrash things out with one another. i hope it works.

ah-wang had ended. =( no more good drama for me to watch. the ending was stupid. =(

"i will be happy if you are happy"

...over...

college day is over

earned ourselves a full day holiday last monday

went to watch the bball semifinals with goi

was impressed by cheryl poon

her 3 pointer shoots were awesome

number 7 became my idol

sports day today

screamed, cheered, shouted

for jess, jiahui, vince and junrong

for ignis

they all did a great job =D

my throat is hurting =(

a wave of GP work came

i cannot handle it

it took away my beauty sleep

so i stoned, dazed, stared in space

my head feels heavy

something is pressing hard on it

no luck for both tests

i just make it =(

i know that i am "different"

cos i am under their watchful eyes

i have no choice but to push on

and not let myself down

i need to rest

to be a better me

...busy...

i have been v busy for the past few days cos of college day rehearsals. they started at 6pm and i only got to leave the school around 9pm. i had my dinner around 10pm for the last 2 nights. how sad. the most depressing thing was most of the food stalls near my house were closed by then. how was i supposed to fill my stomach????

the rehearsals had seriously driven me crazy today. i had no choice but to stay up late at night to complete my last-minute work for 2 consecutive nights. i slept at 2am on wednesday night. and i had to force my eyelids to open last night to study for today's math test. in the end, i lost the battle and felt asleep unknowingly on my study table top for 5 minutes before i woke up in shock. i just dumped the math booklet into my bag and went to sleep.

today was terrible. i forgot my phys notes. i screwed up my math lecture test. others shaded the region at the lower half of the circle and i had to choose to be different during a test. -_- i dropped a pair of chopsticks when i was getting ready to sit down and have my lunch. i left my wallet on the canteen table unattended until chingting reminded me. what a lousy day. =( anyway, it's friday the 13th.

i am glad that all my sufferings will be put to an end tomorrow. oh yeah!!!

people always have misconceptions about PA. if you happen not to know what does PA mean, it stands for PUBLIC ADDRESS. jess could not understand why i complained i was tired after the rehearsals when all i did was to adjust the mic stands, push some faders and press some buttons. i think only those who are doing duty at the backstage were both physically and mentally tired. as for those at the control, it is more of mentally tired. we need to be alert throughout the whole event regardless the duration of the event. we need to be able to solve all technical problems immediately if there happens to be one during the event. we need to ensure that we make NO technical mistakes, especially on the actual day so that the event will run smoothly. that's why we tends to be mentally tired instead of physically tired. like what we believe in, we are the unsung heros. hahaz...

all my favourite TV programmes are ending soon. AMI is down to the final 3. i am soooo happy that carrie is still in the competition. all the way, girl!!! amazing race had ended. i felt it was a pity that rob and amber didnt win the 1 million dollars because it was a stupid mistake by a local, who gave them the wrong directions, cost them to lose the prize. what a waste! apprentice is down to the final 2. i am glad that person won the title. that person truly deserves it. =D i am a supporter of that person. besides, the 7pm channel 8 HK drama series is ending soon. it is the countdown to the final 5 episodes on monday. ah-wang is sooo funny and sweet and caring. so i am left with the desperate housewives. =D

mr tan (the chem tutor) had left. i am still guilty over the matter. the class asked for his permission to excuse ourselves from his double chem tutorial to support the table tennis team at the finals. he agreed to it but i could sense his frustration and helpless in his voice when he gave us the 'go' signal. i could not resist the temptation of the table tennis finals and went with jess, jiahui, beth and eileen. i really appreciated his understanding in this matter. he puts in his heart and soul to teach us. =) thanks! and the encouragement he had given us too. rmb the polar express people?

a good night rest everyone. =) and it's eve's 18th birthday tmr and pee's 18th bday the day after. hahaz... so exciting. i love birthdays, esp the one on 31 jan 1987. =D

"you wouldn't know unless you try"

...kingdom of heaven...

today was generally a happy day. it started off with everyone in hope of having a full day due to the great achievements the performing groups had obtained at the SFY central judging. like what she said, it was an anticipatited announcement. there were speculations that we would be having at least a half day off today. however, it is best to hear the truth for yourself right? true enough, we had a half day off, or rather a three-quarter day off. =)

i watched kingdom of heaven with zh today. initially, i wanted to catch the show because there is my favourite eye-candy acting in the movie as the lead actor. hahaz... this time round, he is in the positive light, unlike the one in troy. what a disappointment! after reading some reviews about the movie, the storyline interested me as well. =) it's a historical event, about having different religions co-exsit together. what's most important is it is a HISTORICAL event. anything about history makes me go crazy. =D

besides drooling over olando bloom, the war made my heart ache. the war started was mainly due to greed, power and frame. can you imagine how many innocent lives had to be lost to satisify one's hunger? the bloodshed, the broken families,... can all these be replaced with power and wealth? so what if you are the master of all masters but you do not find happiness in what you are doing? what's the point of climbing the ladder of power then? to me, staying happy is the most important task i want to complete everyday. =D

not fight for the bricks, the walls. fight for those who live within the walls. i just happened to love this phrase in Balian's war speeches.

you can control the man, but you cannot control the soul. see, it boils down to mental strength again. (self-psycho remember?)

"be brave when you face fear"

...psychological strong...

our minds are a powerful weapon to psycho ourselves to do tasks, especially those that we detest.

had GP lesson today. my group ended up talking to my GP tutor about why we should psycho ourselves everyday in order to complete tasks which seem impossible. it's a marathon. i admit i will not have the strength and stamina to complete the race no matter how well-prepared i am. the hurdles that i have to cross slows the race. and if unfortunately, i happen to trip and fall, i need time to heal and nurse my physical injury. what's worst is i need to overcome the emtional barrier as it will be a blow to my self-confidence when i failed the first time. i need to learn how to recover from my fall. how can all these be done? a mentally strong mind is required. this is when the self-psycho part comes in.

i admire my gp tutor. she lives in malaysia and as to take the trouble to cross the causeway everyday to teach us. imagine how early she has to wake up everyday, the traffic she has to be struck in. she also has to juggle her family with her work as well. hectic lifestyle ya? she told us she managed to pull through because of self-psycho. everyday, she tells herself that she can do it. it really motivates her to carry on till today. =) maybe i can try doing so everyday from tomorrow onwards. talk to myself into doing tasks i hate.

"impossible is nothing"